“For one who has controlled their mind, their mind is their best friend. But for one who has not done so, their mind will be their greatest enemy” – Bhagavad Gita
The greatest battle ever fought is the battle within. And I was losing that battle. Day after day. Week after week. Month after month.
I struggled to wake up each morning, barely had energy for routine tasks, and couldn’t remember the last time I laughed genuinely.
Therapy helped a bit, but I needed something more.
I decided to seek answers beyond the usual solutions. My quest led me to Rishikesh, the Yoga capital of the world. I signed up for a 7-day Yoga and Meditation Retreat at Phool Chatti Ashram.
Don’t be fooled by the word ‘retreat’—this was no vacation. Rather, it was a war between me and my mind.
There were many other ‘popular’ Ashrams offering world-class programs but most of them were in the middle of the city. I wanted to be in a quiet space. Phool Chatti Ashram’s location sealed the deal for me: away from city chaos and right next to Mother Ganga.
When you first hear the word ashram, what comes to your mind?
Monks? Old age?
I had no clue about ashram life and no friends who had been to one. Doubts crept in:
What if I can’t survive a day?
What if I hate the food?
What if I can’t focus?
And what if I become one of those monks who never come back?
But I was stuck between a rock and a hard place.
I shut my inner critic. Took a leap of faith and traveled more than 1400 kms to the land of the sages.
On arrival, I realized Airtel might be the fastest network in the country, but not here. No internet—a blessing in disguise. I was forced to disconnect from the outside world, something I hadn’t done in years.
Do you remember the last time you went anywhere without your phone?
Secondly, I realized there were far more foreigners in the program than there were Indians.
At 5:30 an old-school morning bell would wake us up. We had 30 minutes to freshen up before the day began. First up was a meditation session. Sitting in silence for the first hour of the day was like offering khichdi to a mind that’s used to junk food (social media) every morning.
It felt different.
My mind rebelled but I had no choice. The only sound I could hear was of the river flowing. In that process, many thoughts made their way into my mind. I would gently acknowledge them, then focus my attention back to my breath.
After the meditation session, we passed water from one nostril and let it out from the other- Jal Neti.
It was surprisingly easier than expected. (I would urge you to try it once under supervision)
Around 8 AM began the Asana session (what we popularly call Yoga). If your job involves sitting for 8 hours a day, you’ll realize how messed up your body structure is. Quick – try to do Vrikshasana (tree pose) and see how long you last.
For most Asanas, I needed a block or a strap. I couldn’t even bend down and touch my feet.
My saving grace was Shavasana where I didn’t need any external support.
I was really surprised with foreigners in our group (there were 10 of them) who performed headstands effortlessly. Yoga may have started here, but they had mastered it. I realized me how much I’d neglected my physical and mental health.
After the intense session, it was breakfast time. Poha, sandwiches, pasta, upma, fresh fruits, and porridge were on the menu.
I was just happy that they served tea.
Three things stood out about eating at the Ashram:
- We ate in complete silence (tables were not connected). No TV shows, just the sounds of Mother Ganga and excited rafters.
- We prayed before eating—something most Indian households have stopped doing.
- We cleaned our dishes.
These practices fostered mindfulness and quietened the mental chatter. I would urge you to have one meal per day without any digital device.
As the sun rose, we did Karma Yoga—service to the ashram. We cleaned, watered plants, and arranged rooms, all with gratitude. Not all work must be done for monetary benefits. Sometimes, serving someone else can bring you great satisfaction.
Then came the highlight of the day – Nature walk.
We explored the Him River, Patna waterfall, forests, and the ashram’s beautiful garden. All within 20 minutes walking distance of the Ashram.
Didn’t I tell you that the location of the Ashram was perfect?
Nature’s healing power is real. I wonder why people live in cities where there’s no clean air to breathe, the temperatures seem to be rising each year, there’s shortage of water and you spend an hour in traffic every day.
After spending time in nature, we returned to have lunch which was served at 1 PM. Mostly chapati, rice, vegetables, paneer, rajma, dal etc – typical North Indian food.
By day 3, I had memorized the prayer and made a mental note to be grateful every time I eat something. Mindfulness during meals was a challenge with constant mental chatter and noisy rafters.
Post-lunch, we had a two-hour break.
I spent it journaling, reflecting, and reading spiritual books from the ashram’s library.
Journaling helped me see patterns in my chaotic mind. (Note: Use pen and paper to journal, it is far more effective than typing on a keyboard).
The Ashram prefers a white dress code. Therefore, every alternate day, I was compelled do my laundry.
The last time I saw someone wear white 5 days in a row, it was on television. India were playing against England in a test match.
At 4 PM, we learned Yogic philosophies, including the 8 Limbs (Ashtanga) of Patanjali Yog Sutra. I learnt about practicing Satya and Ahimsa, not with others but with myself. We discussed how these things play out in our lives.
Why hadn’t I learned this before?
Our education focuses on the outside world, neglecting inner wisdom. We learn about renaissance, we learn about world wars, but we don’t learn about ourselves.
We’ve ignored our own culture and traditions, focusing too much on Western teachings.
After the theory session, another intense Asana session followed. Despite the struggle, I never missed a session.
For a change, my body struggled, not my mind.
After a short break, we gathered for Sandhya Arti at the ashram’s temple. People of all faiths attended.
I am not the kind of person who believes in going to a temple every day, but I must say there was something about the energy during this time that made me want to attend it.
This was followed by Kirtan, which often got people into a trance. I enjoyed these sessions.
The chants were in Sanskrit. It was slightly difficult to read at first, but soon, I got the hang of it.
Since I was a rare Indian among these foreigners, I would sometimes be bombarded with questions about the words, or traditions.
The curiosity of the foreigners about Hinduism amazed me.
I realized, how little I knew about my own culture and traditions.
Dinner was served at 7:30 PM each night. (Earlier than my usual time). It was similar north Indian food. The food was simple and wholesome.
The last activity of the day was a meditation session that began at 8:30 PM post which we were asked to keep a Mauna (complete silence) till the next morning.
Honestly, this was difficult.
I wanted to talk to people. I barely called my mom twice during this entire program. But I would head straight back into my room.
Before hitting my bed, I would spend a few minutes journaling my thoughts and then wait to hear the gong on the following morning.
This week at Phool Chatti Ashram was transformative.
Disconnecting from technology and reconnecting with myself allowed me to see life differently. I learned the importance of mindfulness, the value of silence, and the power of gratitude.
I realized how neglecting our inner world can lead to chaos, while nurturing it brings peace.
Take a break from your routine. Disconnect to reconnect. Whether it’s a retreat, a nature walk, or simply a day without your phone, give yourself the gift of introspection. Your mind will thank you.
Very well explained sir.
Thanks for sharing your experiences.
Wonderful!! The story, the place, the writing, and the person behind it. Keep inspiring Smithy!
Excellent Smithy. The storyline was captivating enough.
A fine break indeed.
Best wishes…